DEJECTION

     

Let me tell you a story. This is how it all began…my companion had turned 16. His only goal for the moment was clear…defined…yet complex. A young chap of bubbling nature was he...who believed that he was always a kid. Cartoons & fairy tales still fascinated this boy while the others of his age were glued more into their school textbooks. Nevertheless he was an utter genius...an enigma…which he never wanted to make it a part of himself; a sportsman…who never wanted to run…A creative artist…which dominated his persona. His mind was an archipelago...swarming with secrets. He never wanted to be a king. His mind was always superimposed with these words clearly signifying his hyperactive soul…

JACK

Lets just say I have given this description for the sake simplicity since he was fond boasting about himself to himself more than anyone else. Of course if there was a second person on this earth who knew him better, that had to be me. I knew as much as how he developed his claustrophobia when he locked himself up in his trunk although this was a deep dark secret.

So who am I???

Go on….hazard a guess…no harm in doing so!

Well if you have none other than a close friend or relative in your mind, you lose. My materialistic presence is far from what you could have imagined.

I…AM…HIS…TIE!

Hard to believe?

Don’t be surprised. Was there never a moment when you spoke to your favorite wrist watch about your grumpy boss while taking a glance at it or did you really not pour out your worries to your pet cat just because no one was around to soothe you?

See what I mean?

Of course, my companion was one among a few eccentric freaks who really did not mind considering me his intimate. Our bond grew stronger when he…fell in love.

Before I spill the beans…lets take a look at my companion.

His called himself Kookee; a boy in his mid-teens who lived in a modern Indian society where orthodoxy & culture still prevailed. He preferred this title for unknown reasons. His appearance was never complete without his messy hair. He had presumed that it signified his actions – Confused but clear. His walk was a dignified one with his enquiring eyes ever looking around.

The 16^th year of his life was a turning point. Having no specific interest in brushing up his intellect, he prevented himself from being reckoned a “NERD”. Having mastered the ability to charm the audience on any platform, he decided to exploit himself and fortunately he grew better. Dance, Music, Linguistic skills…the list could go on. Name a talent & Kookee would master it. His prime goal in competing was to give a tough fight against his opponents & to instigate fear. Perhaps this attitude earned him the rank of a prefect & this is when I came to be. I was one of the official neckties to be worn only by the prefects. I sported myself in a smart dark blue background with dark orange double cross-stripes. I could say by the very expression of Kookee that he considered me a key to his perfect attire.

Despite of being the youngest of prefects in the history of his school, nothing could inhibit his performance of his duties. Such was the magnanimity of this lad until one day…things were just beginning to get out of control.

There was a new admission in his class. It was a girl by the name of Nikasha. A charming young lady of shorter physique compared to Kookee…or at least that’s what Kookee thought her to be. Believe me, she looked pathetic. Her academic record was brilliant & flawless, although Kookee never had a regard for this. He was after something more interesting; her skills of a true orator. Kookee had found a new competitor.

In due course of time, both of them had been selected for the “Dude/ Dudette of the decade” pageant. This was prestigious event for those who believed that they had all that it took to be crowned as “The One”. Kookee being a semi-finalist for the past few years had already worked on his strategy. But Nikasha being a fresher sought help from Kookee. Surprisingly, he helped her out. Indeed this was something that was never expected out of someone like Kookee. Nevertheless he guided her & both of them had qualified for the semi-finals.

Kookee watched the entire show until his turn had arrived. As of that moment Kookee was sure of forfeiting the show. Then it was Nikasha’s turn to debate with her opponent. He examined each & every move of Nikasha. He could just hope that she wouldn’t commit the silliest of blunders. Her opponent was a simple contestant but had a shrewd eye. Nikasha tried hard to keep up her pace in the show. Finally it was her opponent who had managed to tackle her with a simple quote of Albert Einstein & justified herself by stating,” Einstein was flawless. Nowhere in history could he be mistaken”.

“Well history had to begin somewhere”, was all Kookee could manage to shout to save Nikasha from the blow she been unable to block. But her paralysis for the moment was sufficient. Her opponent had taken over, leaving a dejected Nikasha to end her show. By now the pen which Kookee had been holding was crushed to pieces in fury.

Kookee tried his best to cheer her up. He couldn’t be too soft on her. He tried his best to crack lame jokes for which it would have been a Herculean task for even a clown to laugh. He tried getting her a drink which he thought would make her feel better. But so much was he obsessed with the idea of consoling that he dint notice his name being called on stage. It was only moments before the last call had he realized it was his turn to prove his worth.

On reaching the stage Kookee had realized that he came across an opponent whom he had failed to observe. He was the very boy who had his go after Nikasha had finished her turn…exactly that period when Kookee was busy giving her tips at the initial stage.

This certainly was a duel of fate. Kookee relied thoroughly on his prodigious skills & struggled to avoid all kinds of trickery. The debate went on for what seemed to be ages. The judges had finally called off the debate & declared it a draw.

Kookee was at world’s end when the results were announced. He held his breadth. This was indeed his last chance to show his worth.

The judges were to announce the results. The judge stepped up stage with a mysterious smile. He then announced in a clear voice,” The runner up for the day......” & Kookee nearly dropped dead. It was him. He had finished for the 2^nd place which he thought was the most insulting appreciation he could ever receive. He believed that his memento will prick his inner conscience & highlight the fact that he was one step below the best.

He was neither bothered to know his mistakes or took the trouble of congratulating the winner whoever he was.

But what had prevented him from stealing the show???

What had prevented him from reaching the goal which he had been preparing for days & months or perhaps even years????

The answer was just a second away. Someone had just given him a hug with a huge “congratulations” smile.

“Nikasha”????

He hardly had time to react. His school was overjoyed by the so-called victory of his as Kookee reckoned it. Above all it was Nikasha who was truly impressed by his talent. Kookee could tell that from her eyes.

The next morning was where the trouble had started. Was he dreaming of her??

I had no idea what was happening, but Kookee woke up with a start and told me, “I think I am in love with her”.

Big mistake. I never expected this….specially from a boy for whom prestige mattered above everything else. He couldn’t have fallen in love with someone who did not have that perfect touch. So for the first time in his life, he was about to let go of everything let alone his ego.

 He began fiddling around with me every time he saw her. He thought that made him look smarter. In a matter of days people began to realize his true intentions and so did Nikasha who never wanted to break her relationship with Kookee, although people would jeer at her. Kookee being impervious to all such activities decided to open his heart, after deciding that she was her perfect woman.

At the end of the academic year when all were supposed to part for a while, Kookee could no longer hold his emotions and went up to her. There was Nikasha in an excited mood realizing that her holidays had just begun.

“Nikasha, I need to have a word with you”

“Anything wrong???”

“It’s just that…I m in love with you”

Kookee never fumbled. He knew exactly what he was doing. Nikasha raised her eyebrows.

“Hey I am seriously in love with you”, shot back Kookee.

There was a minute’s silence of what had seemed hours.

“I am sorry. But I don’t think that is possible”, said Nikasha & walked away.

 “Right then…I will see you soon”, replied Kookee.

It wasn’t the exact kind of reply which a girl would expect in such a scenario. But let’s just conclude that he made a bad Romeo. The news of his failure had spread like wild fire and yet Kookee just laughed at himself. He accepted his defeat. But nobody ever knew what lied beneath.

15 YEARS LATER

“Captain, the winds are too strong. She is gaining speed & we just can’t hold her. Deviated 20 degrees port already”

Without a second’s thought, “Reverse the engines. That should keep her steady for a while. I’ll be there in 6 minutes. This might take the whole night” said Kookee in his casual tone.

“Aye aye, sir”

And the Sailor raced up to the deck.

“Child’s play”, muttered Kookee & got busy with his walkie-talkie.

So this is where our hero stands; onboard a freight liner…the best sea-farer to have handled the rudder. It took a great deal of zeal and courage to brave through the most ferocious of storms. But courage was not to be found in his dictionary for he lacked fear as he had nothing to lose...no one to miss him while he was gone…no one to engage him in a warm embrace when he was home & definitely no one to have a cup of coffee with.

From what I knew, Kookee underwent a change or rather a transformation. His gracious eyes had lost their charm. His smile no longer existed & his character was extinct. A boy who loved to adore himself in the mirror was now repulsive against everything silvery which reflected back what he was. Unable to withstand his failure, he decided to shut down his past. He sealed every memory of his, which would in turn remind him of his greatest setback. A gregarious boy then now enjoyed the dead silence of solitude. People say, “Love is blind”. I say, “Love doesn’t have any senses” because if it did, it wouldn’t have made Kookee immaterial to emotions. A woman’s treachery is far bitterer than the most painful truth.

As a sailor, he had succeeded in taming every obstacle to his own advantage earning him name & fame. But the very fact that he couldn’t remain a proper human being declined his soul, conceivably the most.

I quote from John Keats – “A thing of beauty is a joy forever”. How wrong he was!

Is this the reason why I never bothered taking a look at a lady’s scarf?

Perhaps.